Earl The Dead Cat

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Useless products for people with too much money

Hi! I'm Earl the Dead Cat. Who are you?

Earl The Dead Cat logo Ž
"The last cat you'll ever need."

The only Mad Dog Productions product still available, Earl the Dead Cat has been hanging around doing nothing since 1985. A flat, understuffed toy cat with X's for eyes, Earl comes with a humorous death certificate listing all the reasons a dead cat is better than a live one. Well, a lot of them anyway. For one, he doesn't need a messy litterbox or eat smelly cat food. He doesn't wake you up in the morning by sitting on your nose and mistaking it for a catnip mouse. And he doesn't scratch when the kids swing him around by his tail.

They love him!
They really love him!
Earl was on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson twice. He was in the Weekly World News. Twice. Poison sent him to radio stations to publicize their album "Look What the Cat Dragged In". And people still fondly remember when New York City radio personality Vin Scelsa kept his audience up to date on Earl's welfare, culminating in his daughter Kate baking him in the oven. Mmmmm....Earl a la Kate.

Click here to see a big copy of the death certificate!

CLICK here for a big version!

Wanna buy Earl The Dead Cat?

Believe it or not, you can still get one. Or two. Or a million. Well, if you don't mind waiting for them to be made.
[This is the place!]

Earl was a movie star! It turns out a company called Bizzarre Arts made a short movie called "How to Hit Your Head" which features Earl the Dead Cat, but it hasn't come to a theater near us so we haven't had the privilege of seeing it. Released in April 1995 Starring Nick Crait With TJ Borden, Laura Wheeler. and Clinton C. Christian Written by Nick Crait and Kenneth Armstrong Directed by Kenneth Armstrong Bizzarre Arts says "How To Hit Your Head was a true breakthrough film for Bizzarre Arts project, mostly because it had REAL ACTORS in it! Yayy! It was based on a D+ winning essay by Nick Crait, which detailed very exotic ways to inflict skull fractures upon yourself. The end product, to say the least, kind of sucked. It wasn't long enough for a run on cable access, (also not funny enough) so it was screened for a few people and then quietly laid to rest behind the couch." Obviously Earl didn't have a big enough role. Trying to recoup their losses, they actually tried to sell Earl in a garage prop auction, but he didn't sell. Earl was a photo model! At one time the office walls were covered with photos of Earl-- stuffed toys playing ring toss with Earl, cats who slept on Earl, hot air balloons shaped like Earl. But that was then and this is almost the new millennium. But two photos of Earl have actually shown up on the web. And one one sent in.
Shadow-Marie with Earl. Is she drooling?	Earl with friend (girlfriend?) Spike
Steve Tannehill poses with Earl
Earl on NPR with Michael Feldman's Whad 'Ya Know? in Carbondale, IL	Earl is friends with Cleo and Evinrude	Earl with Jean-Luc Ming the Merciless

Uh-oh!
Earl now stars in his own little animated picture show (thanks to the Earl The Dead Cat web site) . Some people think this is how he died. (HINT: It's only a recreation. Do not try this at home. At work, sure. But not at home.)

[Here's your chance to see it for yourself!]

[More products]

Earl The Dead Cat is a registered trademark of Mad Dog Productions,Inc.